It's been awhile, short version: went to Afghanistan, had another daughter, came home, waiting on command, trying to get back into writing science fiction and fantasy. Living in absolute paradise with my wife and children.

I've been monkeying with story ideas ever since the last couple months of the deployment and I've been fiddling with some outlining and such since I've been home, but something happened the other day that really kicked me in the ass.

There's a guy named Brad Torgeresen who has his novella on the cover of the latest Analog. Analog, for those not in the know, is one of two actual dead-tree magazines printing science fiction (the other being Asimov's). Analog, Asimov's and their electronic counterparts are heir to the tradition of the original sci-fi pulp magazines that first published guys named Heinlein, Bradbury, Clarke, Asimov and Sturgeon.

The name Brad Torgeresen hit me like a small electric shock. You see, about three years ago I was taking a halfhearted swing at getting a couple of shorts published. There was an online sci-fi magazine called Baen's Universe (now defunct) that allowed anybody, pro or amateur, to electronically submit their stories directly into a slushpile. There, the magazine editors and aspiring authors alike would be able to offer constructive criticism and the story would be considered for publication.

One of the other fledgling half-baked proto-writers with whom I had a fair bit of discussion was... Brad Torgeresen. Three years ago, he was exactly where I was; trying to break into the business. Now he's an established pro. He's won some reasonably prestigious awards, published multiple short stories and novellas and I'm sure I'll be seeing a novel from him soon enough. One of his award winning novelettes is available by itself from Analog via Kindle- I remember reading a draft of it in the old Baen's Universe Slush Pile before that magazine went under.

Three thoughts zipped through my mind, upon seeing his name on the cover of Analog- 1) Good for him. 2) It CAN be done. 3) Get of your ass and start writing, Watson. Seriously, three years ago, you two were in the same place, now he's made it and you haven't.

Okay, sure, I've had a bit going on. There was a trip to Iraq in there, and another to Afghanistan. I have two wonderful daughters and the best wife on the face of the planet, all of whom require a fair deal of attention. But the truth is that neither my family nor my career are really what stopped me from getting published. The real root is that in three years, I don't even have a rejection notice to show for my efforts, and given my writing process, it's not that hard to see why.

Instead of sitting down, outlining, writing, revising and then submitting my work to the appropriate market, my process looks more like this: Sit down, outline... outline some more, okay, maybe write a bit, crap, this sucks, never mind. Knuckle down, come back to it. Well, now I'd rather write a swashbuckling sword and sorcery story rather than a police procedural set in a future colony on Mars. Okay, let's try that then, outline... outline some more... quit color coding elements of your venue in the story... dammit, stop ripping off Weis and Hickman in general... no there isn't room for ninjas in this one either(thanks for that honey, :), okay, write for a bit, oh crap, this sucks too. You know what, I think I'd rather write some classic Space Opera anyway...

And what bruises my ego the worst, I think, is that I know I'm hardly the only person with a creative impulse that suffers pretty much this exact same neurosis. I don't even get to be unique and special in my angst and suffering. I might as well dye my hair black and start cutting myself. Blech,

Well, I have decided to start getting some rejections under my belt. The average length the magazines want for a short is 6,000 words. That takes me about three to four hours to write, once I know what I want to say. The trick is in working and re-working it into something I can sell. To keep the goal modest and realistic, I'm going to commit myself to submitting one short story per month. My first deadline is November 30th, that way I can get in a submission for the quarterly Writers of the Future Contest.

I will keep ya'll updated with the submissions, the rejections, and (eventually) the sales. Wish me luck.